Recipes, SCD, follow my journey!
One constant stressor has been my job. I was always an overachiever in school and that didn’t change once I entered the workforce. I graduated college early so I could get a head start in China, working at the Expo and then a number of startups there. However, I started getting sick often (once every few months) and it forced me to take a (much needed) break, to reevaluate and to figure out how to best spend my time. I think I can really relate to King Solomon, who wrote the Book of Ecclesiasties in the Bible. He realized, like I am still learning everyday, that everything under the sun is vain and meaningless. The greatest reward is to enjoy God and to enjoy life. Enjoying might have a negative connotation for some of us, but for me it means to live a life reflective of what we were created to do. It’s sort of a grand idea but I think it is the best way to describe a life lived to the fullest.
Sometimes being aware that you have a chronic disease makes it difficult to live an enjoyable life. You are constantly stressing about finances, about social obligations, about how people will judge you for not “reaching your potential”. You are thinking constantly about what to do next, when you’ll have to run to the bathroom again, and how to be a productive member of society when you can’t cure your illness. Well, I’ve just been thinking a lot, since I’ve had to rest at home due to a flare up. There is nothing I enjoy more than to be able to live a normal life now – to be able to eat a bag of potato chips while chatting with some friends. Though it’ll be a while until I can probably do something like that, how can I make the most of my time now?? How can I rest to the fullest and make sure not to worry or stress so that just maybe, I’ll go into remission again?
I’m reevaluating also what job would be best for me. I thrive in high stress environments where I have to do a million things at once. But maybe it is just because those are the environments I have placed myself in. Perhaps in a low stress environment I would still thrive! I guess it’s always a matter of perspective =)
Because of my health issues, I’ve become very interested in fitness, eating well, exercise, and (I’ve always been interested in) mental/emotional health. Who knows what this will all lead to?